An Introduction to Masturat Jamaat - Pt 7

The second tafakud resulted in the similar manner, same excuses, but even lesser effort to convince her on my part then before. I guess I myself was not fully ready for it and had a negative preconception about the result, though I could not help but felt bad about it. Then came the third tafakud.

I felt entirely different during the third tafakud. The first one was rather blurry for me. The second one was lacked enthusiasm on my part. But I was overwhelmed with shame during the third tafakud. At first I could not bear facing the same responsible brothers for the masturat effort for three consecutive times in three consecutive months. What would be their perception of me? How could I not convince my own wife to join me and the other couples in the blessed journey of dakwah and tabligh? All sort of shameful thought came to my mind. I've heard of a few unfortunate people's easy way out when they said that even Prophet Nuh alayhis salam's wife had disobeyed her husband. But I refused to compare my other half with the wretched wife of Prophet Nuh alayhis salam. How could I ever do that? And how could I even compare my effort with the great effort of one of the great Nabi of Allah, when Allah Ta'ala declares that Nuh alayhis salam had made the effort of dakwah "layla wan nahar" (night and day, day and night , ceaselessly) for 950 years? I know that I had to shun the feeling of shame facing men rather than bowing down in shame facing Allah Most High on the Day of Judgement. There is no other option for me other than to face the third tafakud. (Please note that I was fighting with my own feeling and in no way it suggests that the noble wise responsible brothers of the masturat jamaat harboured any awful thought against me).

Soon after I had faced the ordeal of the third tafakud, one of my dear friend, Edy Herianto Majlan @Abdul Hadi, who was also in the same masturat jamaat with me, suggested for me to buy all the necessary items at the shops in the compound of the markaz for my wife, in preparation for her to join the jamaat. It was something that I had never thought of before. What is the point of making tasykeel to your wife when there is no preparation made to ease her in making decision? Thus, I bought an abaya, a two-layered pardah, a pair of ladies gloves and a pair of stockings - all of them black in colour. 

I laid all the items that I bought on the bed in front of her when I arrived home with a grin on my face. She shrieked when she saw them. Her shrieking came with words of disapproval but somehow I could see a smile on her face. She even tried the pardah in front of the mirror amidst her mumbling of complaints. 

A day before the scheduled departure of our jamaat, I sat alone after zuhur namaaz in our old small wooden surau/musolla and made du'a to Allah Ta'ala after two rakaat of solatul hajat. I complained, complained and complained of my weakness to Allah until I burst into tears. I honestly could feel that my du'a would be accepted by Allah. However, it was not after more tests being put before me. On the morning of the scheduled departure date, I found myself pleading to her to join the masturat jamaat. I was ready with my luggage and bedding packed since the night before but she had made nothing in preparation. Nothing...and we  were already late for masturat hidayat bayan. It was the longest plead to anyone that I could recall of. Abdul Hadi has been calling me several times over the phone. It seemed that the best I could do was to make her promise to join me in a masturat jamaat the next month when deep inside me I know that there would never be a fourth tafakud.

I was about to give up entirely and decided to join the local three days men's jamaat that was scheduled on the same day, when my last plead to her was, "You may promise me to join a masturat jamaat next month, but know this that you will have to join a jamaat that are strangers to you. You won't be joining people that you know, who are your friends like this jamaat." At the point when all hope and expectancy gone, as I picked up my luggage and bedding to leave, to my utter pleasant surprise she said, "Alright then." 

Subhanallah! Truly Allah Ta'ala decides in the most astonishing and marvelous way!

  

An Introduction to Masturat Jamaat - Pt 6

"Why should I go out leaving the house and the children for three days? Is it not sufficient just to read the ta'leem at home with the children? If you want to go out for tabligh, then go! Leave me out of it." That might not be her exact speech word by word, but that was certainly the gist of it when I asked her to join the three days masturat jamaat that had been formed. I had to refrain myself from turning my invitation to a prolonged argument that may be detrimental to the whole intent and purpose - mainly, because I could easily get agitated and angry as a husband and as a father; another reason was because of the advises that I got from friends who have experience in masturat effort: "Hawa had been created by Allah Ta'ala from the rib of Prophet Adam alayhi salam. Hence, like the shape of the rib, women's liking and behaviour is naturally 'bended'. You cannot use force to straighten it, alas it will break in two. But if you leave it as it is, it will forever be 'bended'." 

So, when the scheduled date to join the earlier formed masturat jamaat had passed in vain, I told my other half that I would go for another tafakud for the second time, albeit her protest.

Hazrat Mufti Mahmud Hassan Gangohi rahmatullah alayhi further wrote, "The objective of the tabligh jamaat is to learn the Deen and to become steadfast in it as well as to prepare others to do the same. It is often necessary to undertake distant journeys for this purpose. Just as men need to learn the Deen, women do too, but there is not always the infrastructure in place for this. To achieve this objective, it will be permissible for them to undertake journeys even to London on condition that they are accompanied by a mahram, hijab and other regulations are observed and no rights of any people are violated. In fact, doing this is beneficial and necessary for the Deen. If the children are not so small that they are totally dependent on their mother and if the grandmother is capable of caring for them, there will be no harm in the mother going. May Allah Ta'ala bless this journey, assist the jamaat, bring them back with success and take care of the children."

An Introduction to Masturat Jamaat - Pt 5

Hazrat Mufti Mahmud Hassan Gangohi rahmatullah alayhi wrote, "Upon the request of the women, Rasulullah sallalaahu alayhi wassalam fixed a day of the week and a venue for women, to gather (to be addressed by him). In addition to this, women used to approach the Prophet's sallalaahu alayhi wassalam wives to learn and to ask questions. This is all reported in the Ahadith." He continued, "It is utmost importance for some arrangement to be made to teach women. Of course, it is necessary that such arrangements conform with the Shari'ah. For example, they should attend a venue in their locality donned in hijab and not in the company of non-mahram. If one of the women has to read from a book or say something, her voice should not reach any non-mahram male. No loudspeakers should be used and the women should not gather without good purpose. If they need to go to another locality, they should be accompanied by a mahram. If the regulations of the Shari'ah are flouted, evil will be the only product. May Allah save us from that."

Weeks passed by and we continued to spend our weekend for two and half hours every week. She would join the closed ladies circle of knowledge in the house whilst I would wait for her in the the adjoining masjid. When we took our children along, I would take care of our baby boy in the masjid, while our two elder daughters joined their mama in masturat ta'leem. Men are expected to take care of their children so that their wives would get full benefit from ta'leem, uninteruptted by children.

Meanwhile, after the weekly mesyuarah that I attended at Kuala Lumpur markaz, without discussing it first with my wife, I decided to enter my name for the first time for three days short tour in masturat jamaat. I then set for tafakud together with the other few brothers who also intended to go in masturat jamaat (as I said earlier, there were not many persons involved in masturat effort then). In masturat effort, the tartib and usool (rules and regulations) in accordance to Shariah concerning women are very strictly adhered to in order to preserve the chastity of womenfolk. For example, I first learnt that women's names are not to be written in the prepared sheet. It is sufficient just to enter the husband's name who represents the couple.

I felt a little awkward during my first tafakud for masturat jamaat. Tafakud is the aamal where a couple of responsible brothers would interview each individual men who are destined to travel in the same jamaat. What is your experience in masturat effort? Have you taken your wife to masturat ta'leem? Will you be using your own transport? (among other things asked). If everything is satisfactory, an amir or a leader among them will then be appointed. Only then, the jamaat will be endorsed and given a route. 

All the jamaat formed will then be briefed of the tartib and usool of masturat jamaat. I must say that having listened to the briefing for the first time, I was astonished at the details and strictness of the rules and regulations in relation to the masturat effort, especially in preserving and elevating the chastity of Muslim women. So much so that there is one usool above the others, "Let the hearts break, but let not the usool break." 

An Introduction to Masturat Jamaat - Pt 4

A marriage vows in Islam means the passing of huge responsibilities from the bride's guardian to the groom to do his utmost to safe the bride from the torment of Jahannam and guide her into the blessing of Jannah. That was the essence of a khutbah nikah (marriage sermon) that I, for the first time, heard in a marriage ceremony in India during my dakwah and tabligh journey there sometime ago. I had never heard such thing before. Not even during my marriage ceremony. The practice of khutbah nikah is alien in our country, at least not in the form that I've witnessed in India. The short speech was full of advices and moral exhortation. 

Anyway, for quite some time, the mere mentioned of masturat ta'leem had invited extended negative rambling and nagging from my wife. I had to instantly kill the subject partly because I have short temper, but mainly because I knew I did not get it right the first time. But I have no choice - as a husband and a father, I could not just shove away my responsibilities towards my wife and my children in respect of Deen. There is no compromise. I had to find the solution.

Alas, alhamdulillah, in the midst of my troublesome, my wife befriended a few wives of my karkun friends who made occasional ziyarah at our house. From their visits, my wife had learnt about another place that host weekly masturat ta'leem not far from our area. Actually, I had known the place even before I first took my wife to her first 'disastrous' masturat ta'leem. But I threw away the idea of bringing her to this place thinking that the latter large double-storey bungalow house would appease her more than the simple rustic single-storey wooden house. And how I had gravely misjudged my wife! 

It was the simple unadorned wooden house that opened up again the pathway for her to the effort of Deen. Open door and open arms, everything had gone perfectly well this time. My impure corrupted heart was astonished when she came out from her long-overdue second masturat ta'leem in jovial mood and full of praises to the host. It was totally contrary to her first 'bad experience'. It was a priceless lesson to me that I know I could not get by merely reading kitaabs. What my wicked mind thought as unpleasant and objectionable, turned out to be pleasant, splendid and delightful. Allah Ta'ala only requires pure concern for Deen from us, nothing more, nothing less.

In awe-struck, I was thankful to Allah that my plan for our first three days tour together in masturat jamaat was right back on course.

An Introduction to Masturat Jamaat - Pt 3

Hazrat Ali radiyalaahu anhu, as regards this statement, "Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire" (surah tahrim 66:5), has said, "Teach good to your household." In Tafsir Tabari, it is is like this, "Give them education and teach them good manners." No doubt men would have to shoulder this heavy burden. Nevertheless, womenfolk, being wives and mothers, the hands that rocked the cradles are the first madrasah-like institutions to the children. Since the time of Rasulullah sallalaahu alayhi wassalam and the Companions radiyalaahu anhum, it has always been the case, and it will continue to be the case that women manage the household, educate the children, whilst men go for jihad and work for provisions for the families. Thus, the piety of a mother would have huge impact in the development of pious generations and society at large. 

Without experience and with limited knowledge that I have from conversing with those brothers who had been with masturat jamaat, I began the first step in introducing the effort of masturat jamaat to my wife. It was a disastrous result.  Not knowing how to explain to her and for fear of outright rejection which I was not ready to swallow, I simply rushed her to go for the weekly ta'leem masturat one weekend. Ta'leem masturat is an amal where ladies from the surrounding areas would gather in a specific house to listen to the knowledge imparted. This amal is exclusively for ladies. It is conducted once a week for two and a half hours (usually on weekend) at a specific time and specific place. 

Perhaps I was too eager and impatient in my effort. I simply told her that there was a 'ladies-only' invitation at a friend's house not far away. After some coaxing and convincing, she finally agreed to attend the house gathering. I drove her to the doorsteps of the house and made her enter the house to her annoyance and hesitation. Silly me! What was I thinking at that time? I could not blame her for feeling awkward in entering a stranger's house without anyone that she knew. The truth is I, myself did not even know the house-owner in person. At the end of her first ta'leem masturat, my wife came out with blazing fury.

"You left me with total strangers!", she said. "I felt out of place. I don't know anyone. I don't know where I was suppose to sit. I don't even know who the host is!" And her complaint and nagging continued until we reached home. I realised I had made some errors and I knew then it would be an uphill tasks for me.

An Introduction to Masturat Jamaat - Part 2

Before I focussed my attention towards masturat effort, I used to carry a wayward thought about the few brothers (at that time) who were involved in masturat jamaat. I thought of them as a little 'softies' and even the way they interacted did not appease me. Perhaps my head was clouded with the idea that masturat jamaat was about men serving women. But it just proved how naive I was about the masturat effort.


The object of dakwah and tabligh effort in general is to bring Deen alive in the entire world. The object of masturat jamaat in particular is to bring one hundred percent of Deen alive into the lives of every single women. This is the utmost importance, since nobody can ever be successful if he/she does not have Deen. No person can claim that he/she is pious and does not have to go in jamaat because of his/her piety. There is no end to piety. The person who claims to be pious is in reality the one who is most in need of going out in jamaat. The effort in jamaat is not confined to those who are far away from Deen and who are living on the streets but it is also and more important for those who are regular in solaah, zikr, tilawah, etc. to go out in jamaat in order to perfect these actions, to develop devotion and concentration in solaah and zikr, etc. and also to bring others (who are away from Deen) more closer to Allah Ta'ala. Masturat jamaat enables the womenfolk also to propagate this Deen directly to other women.  

My wife had been regularly sitting in the circle of fadha'il ta'leem at home together with my children. Every night after Isya', I and my wife would alternately read the kitab - Fadha'il Amal. At that point of time, when her reading came to the chapter on virtues of dakwah and tabligh, she would stop reading and passed the kitaab to me to continue. I then realised that my other-half was still not willing to accept or support my involvement in the effort of dakwah and tabligh. She could see the benefits of ta'leem, but she still could not see any benefit to her and the children in being left by her husband, travelling in tours of dakwah and tabligh.

I just could not ignore the fact that true happiness in marriage and family only will come if both husband and wife, and all the children share the same thing - one mindset and one heartfelt. For the non-believers, they find it in fulfilling the common worldly desires. For us Muslims, we will find it in bringing the complete Deen in our lives. Thus, I started another quest for an effort to bring the work of dakwah and tabligh in my family. I thought, "If she is not ready for it - and nobody that I knew was gladly ready for it at first, including myself - I would present it to her in such a way that she would have no reason not to accept it."

An Introduction to Masturat Jamaat - Part 1

About two or three years after my journey of dakwah and tabligh to India, Pakistan and Bangladesh for three chillah (four months), I still did not place serious thought about the importance of involving me and my wife in masturat jamaat. Not until my friends, Salman Kantani and Sufi Hassan, came back from their first three days of dakwah and tabligh tour in masturat jamaat, together with their respective wives. 

I remember Salman had just been married at that time. His parents had rejected the idea of him marrying a daughter of any karkun (tablighi). All sort of unreasonable excuses and vindication were placed before him. Perhaps they are not ready to accept another tablighi in the family, or they might have thought that a lady-partner not associated with dakwah and tabligh effort would eventually subdue and abrogate the 'extremism' in their son's way of life. 

And it followed that with full blessing from his parents and barakah, Salman uttered the sacred vow of nikah to a fine lady who would later became one of the closest friends of my wife. As much as I want to say, "And they live happily ever after...", the best part did not end here. A couple of months after their marriage, the newly-wed couple, together with Sufi Hassan and his wife had embarked onto a tour of faith for three days for the first time in masturat jamaat.

Verily Allah Most High ordains the attainment of felicity (attainment of desires, happiness, success, propserity, freedom from anxiety in this world and the next) of mankind, men or women, in the practices of the perfect deen, insofar as he/she obeys Allah Most High and His Rasul. Women are greater in number than men in today's population of the world, whereas the number of children are larger than women. When womenfolks understood and have concern for deen, they will revive the environment of deen in their houses. When the environment of deen prevails in the houses of Muslims, there will come forth pious children - male & female - alim and alimah, hafiz and hafizah, mujahid and mujahidah.

Back from their three days tour in masturat jamaat, both Salman Kantani and Sufi Hassan did not waste time at all in alluring me with their karguzari (narration and description) of the tour in masturat jamaat. The magnetism of their karguzari  had kept me listening to them for almost two hours in my car right from after Isya' prayer.And that was the first time anyone had ever put a serious thought on me about the importance of involving my wife in masturat jamaat.


And both Salman and Sufi Hassan had started a delightful episode of their lives having their respective wives as a driving force behind their intensifying effort of dakwah and tabligh. By the grace of Allah Most High, I surely would not let myself miss the ride!